I was asked by the local Chamber of Commerce if I would photograph the Town of Strathmore’s 2024 Stampede Parade on August 3rd, 2024. Sure, why not? That was before I found out that Alberta’s flaming whackdoodle of a Premier, Danielle Smith, would be in the parade.
On the bright side of things, I think I probably got the best picture of Smith that anyone can claim to have ever gotten of her. That’s because the hand of local MLA Chantelle De Jong is obscuring the face of her boss.
This isn’t a bad thing because Smith has one of the worst cases of Resting Bitch Face in Canadian politics. The less one sees of it, the better. Why the vitriol? This is the woman who said of cancer patients:
“…when you think about everything that built up before you got to stage four and that diagnosis, that’s completely within your control and there’s something you can do about that that is different.”
She trotted out this turkey during the UCP leadership race in 2022 and tried to walk it back, badly. Just like she does everything else: Badly. My friend Ray, who had recently been diagnosed with stage four cancer was not impressed with her victim blaming, especially given his extremely healthy lifestyle pre-diagnosis. I distinctly remember what he said to me that evening…
“Sean, that woman is a real See You Next Thursday.” He was right then and he is still right today. Anyhow, I’m very proud to be the person who finally got a good photo of her out in public. That was a win.
Strathmore’s own politicians were in the parade and I’d say they are mostly doing a good job. My favourites are Pat Fule, the current mayor, and Melissa Langmaid, who I am really hoping will be the next mayor when the current one decides he has had enough. Both Fule and Langmaid represent the town well.
I think the best part of the parade for me was the Al Azhar Shriners from Calgary rolling in. They show up faithfully every year there is a parade and it seems like they add something new every year, too. The dinos and the buses are new from last year’s parade. I loved the Shriners when I was five and I still love them at fifty-five because they always bring the magic.
It’s worth mentioning that while the Shriners are famous for being goofy in public, they’re a legit charity that does a lot of work helping sick kids and their families. They’re important to their communities and deserve a lot of respect.
The local bunch that got the most clapping and cheering was the Over the Hill Gang from Wheatland Lodge. This is a group of retired folks with mobility scooters and a wicked sense of humor. They have formed their own impromptu “biker gang” locally and they ride the pathways in town with their “gang colours” on display, occasionally challenging ten year olds on bikes to race them. They are loved.
It’s kind of tough to choose the best local parade entry as there were some really good ones. I’m giving the nod to Joy Plumbing with their poop emoji themed float and costume. It takes some cajones to float a, uh, “floater” down the parade route. They not only made it work, but the fun was infectious and they had a lot of people laughing hard.
Expressions Dance probably had the most impressive entry in terms of numbers, effort, and entertainment. This group of kids peformed extremely well choreographed dances for the entire parade route, with only very short breaks between numbers. The amount of energy they put into it would have killed the average person. Very impressive.
Second place for performing goes to the young fellow who was following along behind the Strathmore Bubble Tea Brewers float. Dude could bust a move and a half with some serious bumping, grinding, and booty shaking. The only thing wrong was the selection of music. It was a real missed opportunity that he wasn’t dancing to Gangnam Style. He also got tonnes of cheers and applause.
While not at the same level as the dance club, the local gymnastics club also put on a good display with lots and lots of cartwheels. I was glad to see that no kid biffed it on the pavement.
Tyrell Riding Academy put on an impressive, albeit low-key showing. If you like horses, they had them in spades, maybe more than any other group. They did mess up the parade route somewhat (more on that in a bit).
There were three Disney Princesses in the parade and neither my wife or I could figure out what organization they were attached to, but the five-year-old girls lining the parade route didn’t care. There was lots of excited shouting, hopping up and down, and squealing when a princess waved at them.
There was a lot of other “royalty” on hand in the form of local rodeo princesses and queens, who formed a long procession down main street. Leading them was Miss Strathmore Stampede 2024, Tenley Warburton.
The Calgary Stampede crew makes a point of participating in the parades of many of the other stampedes around the province and they generally class things up. Lots of beautiful horses with attractive riders and everything just so. Harry the Horse, the Calgary Stampede mascot, was along for the ride with his infamous YA and HOO signs.
There were some other types of horses in the parade, ones that didn’t create the kind of mess normal horses do. Well, at least I hope they didn’t.
The local square dancing club likes to make an appearance every year and they have a crew that bops around in their horse costumes handing out candy. The only thing I have against these guys is that they’re bad for not sticking to their chunk of the parade and they have an amazing talent for walking into shots.
Veterans Supporting Veterans made an apperance with some classic motorcyles, which I liked, and some of those pseudo-car-bike hybrids, which I don’t like one bit. Make up your mind and either buy a real bike or a Smart Car, but not something that looks like a Big Wheel Trike cross bred with a Transformer. Gross.
(Note that I am disrespecting the ride, not the vet.)
There were lots of kids present, and you could tell most of them were there for the candy. The competition over what was thrown towards them was pretty cutthroat, especially amongst siblings.
While the kids on the sidelines collecting candy were happy for the most part, some of the kids, tweens, and teens pressed into service in the parade itself were much less so. There were the strained smiles of the variety you see in a dentist’s office. Indifference. Ignoring the crowd and chatting amongst themselves. Exhaustion from walking or riding a long route. Boredom. Sideways glances at the kids along the sidewalk they would rather be with picking up candy. Etc.
My favourite was the young lady with the phone who was representing Heritage Park. She was something of an anachronism given their theme, and she barely looked up from her phone at all when they went past.
On a more cheerful note, there were mascots and some characters in costume who were all a big hit with the littles. The blue mascot for Boston Pizza was doing a great job of intertacting with the kids. Also with the photographer as I had to shoo him out of my shot to get a good picture of the float he was tagging along with.
Other crowd favourites were the RCMP police dog (you could hear parents nearby saying, “no you can’t go pet it!”). The baton twirler at top right wasn’t doing a tame routine, but really hard tricks and would occasionally drop a baton. No one cared because she had mad skillz and was doing some advanced looking stuff.
The antique cars, trucks, and tractors also went over well with the crowd. The tractor got lots of cheers from the kids when it burned circles along the parade route.
There are two fire stations in Strathmore and also two fire departments. The first is Strathmore’s own fire department, which serves the town. The second is the Wheatland County fire department, which serves the surrounding county, but is based in town. In practice it’s not uncommon to see both departments to roll to the same large fires and have each others’ backs. It’s a nice arrangement that provides extra protection to both the residents of the town and the county. They rolled their iron through the parade route near the end of the event.
Last but not least was the cleanup crew following the parade with shovels and equipment to cope with all of the aforementioned equine doody that was left along the route. Said doody made keeping choreographing difficult for the poor dance troupe and baton twirlers.
The crew fairly swaggered around the corner wielding their shovels while wearing their high-vis, and all that was missing was the theme from Bad Boys. There was strutting. They made quick work of the horse flop and you could see from the bucket of the John Deere loader that they had collected a fair amount from the parade route. Whatever problems the horses may have had, constipation was not among them.
A street sweeper followed along behind, and as it passed that meant that Strathmore’s 2024 Stampede Parade was at an end. Everyone I chatted with agreed that it was one of the best yet aside from, y’know, Premier Dipstick.
The cameras used for this entry were a Canon EOS 50D, 7D, and R5. Lenses were a 17-85mm on the 50D, a 70-300mm on the 7D, and a 24-105mm on the R5. Pictures were taken by both Sean and his wife and we can’t remember who did which at this point.
